Splitting sickness: the invisible pain of adoptees

lara trace hentz

By Lara/Trace

There is no time machine to transport you back to the moment you were abandoned. You can’t erase how you felt or how it feels now.  Or how it controls your life.  Or how it breaks your heart into a million pieces.  You don’t know how to stop feeling this way. You pray you’ll find your family, someone like you, who gets you, who looks like you. You want to put the pieces of your life back together, but you don’t know how.

These were thoughts I had writing my memoir One Small Sacrifice…. There are many adoptees who feel this way yet never get to say it. No matter how much love and care we are given, the truth is – we are (and will always be) someone else’s children. We’re usually not able to say this to our adoptive families.

Not one doctor diagnosed me (an…

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